Should a guy who discarded his daughters own the right to see them again?
I became pregnant with identical triplet girls easily when I was very young. My boyfriend be very irresponsible, he said he would be there and be responsible but he lied and he left when they be infants and didn't want anything to do with them for all this time, he never wanted to even stop by or ask about how they were, and I had to put on a pedestal them all on my own, even with my parents' help it be very hard. But my girls are very sweet delicate girls who always give me so much joy. They're nearly 16 in a minute and they are certainly used to life without their "father", they don't even know him and they vote he makes no difference to them. But after all this time, all of a sudden he get in contact with me and asked me if he could meet them and see them. Would you allow him to? What would you explain to him? And why would he suddenly want to see them after all this time?
at 16 your girls are old adequate to choose whether they meet him or not, I don't think it is entirely up to you. Maybe he has finally grown up and realised his mistake. if the girls are afire, give it a chance, you can't say no lately to punish him.
I wouldn't yet, especially if the girls have no interest in it. If he bugs you too much make clear to him you're going to file abandonment which will be super hard for him to fray if he takes you to court. I'm sorry but the guy sounds like a jerk that by in a minute you know nothing about and your girls are at the ripe age of 16. Tell him to wait 2 years when they label the decision and then leave it up to the girls.
If i be in that situation i would only let him congregate them if my girls were okay with that!
After he pays all the spinal column support.
You can force that.
I would probably sit down and talk to the girls to see what they thought about it.
That way they couldn't hold it against you if they did want to see what the loser looks resembling.
Then sue the pants off him.
Personally, I don't suggest it's my decision to make. If my daughters wished to see their father, that's their choice. Maybe he truly does regret disappearing them, and has come back to try to repent. Explain the situation to your daughters, and let them cause up their minds. At least this way, you won't get caught surrounded by the middle with "Why won't you let me see them/him?"
personally, no, i wouldn't. i would let him see them if my kids were in truth interested in it but if they weren't and didn't really care, then i would voice no.
Answers: listen, my dad recently just found me again after abandon me and im 21! he contacted me on my birthday.
it was awkward for me because i felt the same instrument your girls felt. I never really got what all the hype be about. until i met him. and i learned things about him. he told me things that be interesting, and helped me understand him better. and he was no longer that 'deadbeat a** that moved out me whan i was 3 and never came back'. everyone deserves a 2nd chance, and a destiny to tell their side.
i think even though it's going to be awkward, and your kids wont probably fall contained by love with him right away, you still shouldnt spite him for wanting to see his kids. you should be encouraging him. he's FINALLY manned up.but im not saying you should merely trust him, and fall into his hands like playdoh. hang on to your guard up, but still let him in. and think of it approaching this, HE contacted YOU. that means he made an effort, and that shows commitment. if you dont let him see them, what make you different than him? you would be enabling him to be a deadbeat dad, y'know? those lonely years can never be erased, but at least he's making up for lost time.
i love my dad now, and im glad he contracted to find me. and sometimes guys dont have a reason like us superior girls do. my dad only just said ''hey, i wonder where my daughter is'' one day. weird, but true. lol. i diaphanous kyou should at least give him a chance, but gross it on you and your daughters' terms. let him know that this is YOUR lives, and he's lucky to even get a sneak meeting. lol. remember, you dont need him, you guys did fine without him for 16 yrs. this is a privelage to HIM! make appointments and be paid sure he keeps them or THERE WILL be consequences. but also, dont nag him into seeing them too much because then it will seem similar to a chore to him and he will probably be scared off again.
if youre scared of your daughters getting hurt or permit down, dont be. if you go into this with a realistic outlook, and still settle on to give it a try, if the worst happens, at least you be prepared for it. plus, i think this is one of those things that's worth giving a chance. let them amount out for themselves who their dad is. theyre 16, and they can think for themselves NOW. what's the point in waiting for them to turn 18? it may be too late...
i longing you the best of luck!
That is one I would start out to the daughters, just remind them that they can have different opinions.
ask your daughters if they want to you can let him see them, show him how wonderful they are and what he has missed out on, then its up to your daughters if they want to see him again.
Tell him to wait until they are 18 & later he can contact them if they wish. Until then you may want to protect them from being hurt by him at tiniest until they are adults & can make up their own minds about him. Up to this point he has done nil financially or emotionally to help care for these girls so as minors in your comfort he doesn't deserve to try & jump in & take credit in a minute when you've done all the work(triplets WOW!- thats a lot of work!). He may sincerely have regrets roughly speaking his past actions, he may really want to be a part of their lives but it doesn't excuse any of it. He can lurk now until they are grown & meet them on their terms. Just my belief.
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at 16 your girls are old adequate to choose whether they meet him or not, I don't think it is entirely up to you. Maybe he has finally grown up and realised his mistake. if the girls are afire, give it a chance, you can't say no lately to punish him.
I wouldn't yet, especially if the girls have no interest in it. If he bugs you too much make clear to him you're going to file abandonment which will be super hard for him to fray if he takes you to court. I'm sorry but the guy sounds like a jerk that by in a minute you know nothing about and your girls are at the ripe age of 16. Tell him to wait 2 years when they label the decision and then leave it up to the girls.
If i be in that situation i would only let him congregate them if my girls were okay with that!
After he pays all the spinal column support.
You can force that.
I would probably sit down and talk to the girls to see what they thought about it.
That way they couldn't hold it against you if they did want to see what the loser looks resembling.
Then sue the pants off him.
Personally, I don't suggest it's my decision to make. If my daughters wished to see their father, that's their choice. Maybe he truly does regret disappearing them, and has come back to try to repent. Explain the situation to your daughters, and let them cause up their minds. At least this way, you won't get caught surrounded by the middle with "Why won't you let me see them/him?"
personally, no, i wouldn't. i would let him see them if my kids were in truth interested in it but if they weren't and didn't really care, then i would voice no.
Answers: listen, my dad recently just found me again after abandon me and im 21! he contacted me on my birthday.
it was awkward for me because i felt the same instrument your girls felt. I never really got what all the hype be about. until i met him. and i learned things about him. he told me things that be interesting, and helped me understand him better. and he was no longer that 'deadbeat a** that moved out me whan i was 3 and never came back'. everyone deserves a 2nd chance, and a destiny to tell their side.
i think even though it's going to be awkward, and your kids wont probably fall contained by love with him right away, you still shouldnt spite him for wanting to see his kids. you should be encouraging him. he's FINALLY manned up.but im not saying you should merely trust him, and fall into his hands like playdoh. hang on to your guard up, but still let him in. and think of it approaching this, HE contacted YOU. that means he made an effort, and that shows commitment. if you dont let him see them, what make you different than him? you would be enabling him to be a deadbeat dad, y'know? those lonely years can never be erased, but at least he's making up for lost time.
i love my dad now, and im glad he contracted to find me. and sometimes guys dont have a reason like us superior girls do. my dad only just said ''hey, i wonder where my daughter is'' one day. weird, but true. lol. i diaphanous kyou should at least give him a chance, but gross it on you and your daughters' terms. let him know that this is YOUR lives, and he's lucky to even get a sneak meeting. lol. remember, you dont need him, you guys did fine without him for 16 yrs. this is a privelage to HIM! make appointments and be paid sure he keeps them or THERE WILL be consequences. but also, dont nag him into seeing them too much because then it will seem similar to a chore to him and he will probably be scared off again.
if youre scared of your daughters getting hurt or permit down, dont be. if you go into this with a realistic outlook, and still settle on to give it a try, if the worst happens, at least you be prepared for it. plus, i think this is one of those things that's worth giving a chance. let them amount out for themselves who their dad is. theyre 16, and they can think for themselves NOW. what's the point in waiting for them to turn 18? it may be too late...
i longing you the best of luck!
That is one I would start out to the daughters, just remind them that they can have different opinions.
ask your daughters if they want to you can let him see them, show him how wonderful they are and what he has missed out on, then its up to your daughters if they want to see him again.
Tell him to wait until they are 18 & later he can contact them if they wish. Until then you may want to protect them from being hurt by him at tiniest until they are adults & can make up their own minds about him. Up to this point he has done nil financially or emotionally to help care for these girls so as minors in your comfort he doesn't deserve to try & jump in & take credit in a minute when you've done all the work(triplets WOW!- thats a lot of work!). He may sincerely have regrets roughly speaking his past actions, he may really want to be a part of their lives but it doesn't excuse any of it. He can lurk now until they are grown & meet them on their terms. Just my belief.
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