What should I do roughly speaking my husband?

We have a daughter together. She just turned one year old yesterday. I know she wants corrected, but every little thing she does, every single little whine or cry, my husband tells her to stop and she knows better and that he is going to bust her hind running out or spank her or smack her mouth, leg, ect. He has no patience and a terrible resentment. I can not take it anymore. He doesn't want much to do with her at home, but as soon as other people are around, he is adjectives over her, playing and things. He rarely helps me with her. I am only sick of it all. I have caught him in lies only just about looking at other women and there were exposed women pics on our computer that he swears he didn't look at, but I know he did. I mean really, how else would they have gotten there? I am not stupid, and I am not a doormat. He is deeply rough with our daughter, Masey. She is my whole life, the most precious contribution I've ever gotten. He thinks that she should understand things like an grown but she is just a baby! And when she doesn't, he gets nutty and smacks her, so of course she cries. He doesn't smack her hard enough to hurt her, but it really hurts her morale and makes her cry more. Then he gets even more mad because she doesn't stop crying when he tell her in a hateful tone to stop crying and "dry it up!". A minute ago she was pulling up to the trash can and he told her he be going to bust her hind end for it and I just looked at him and he said "what?!" and I told him that I know she needs disciplined and corrected but that every little article she does he is always threatening her. And he said "What, so you can discipline her but I can't? I'm tired of you always bit$#ing at me over that. I am getting sick of it." And then I simply put Masey in her stroller and took her for a 25 minute walk to calm down. I can't filch this. I am tired of it, other people even notice how he acts near her. (Harshly) What do you suggest I do? I don't want a divorce, but if he keeps it up, I will leave him. My daughter is my top priority and it's gotten to the point I don't even want her to be around him. I don't even trust him to watch her while I'm within the shower because every time he does, he complains about it and tells me to hurry up and then as soon as I turn the wet off I can hear her crying in the living room. Anyone ever been through this? I'm so confused. He claims to be a Christian but the opening he acts really doesn't reflect it at all. I am a Christian and not a soul is perfect, but good grief, I am at my breaking point! Can anyone tell me their thoughts or their situations? I am so sorry it's so long, I basically really need some help. Thank you. By the way. I am going on 25, he is going on 28. We hold been married for three years. Masey was planned and he does play with her some, but solitary when he feels like it. I never feel close to it but I still love playing with her. She's awesome!
Well, if you don't want a divorce right very soon, the only thing I can think of is I don`t know doing some parenting classes with him? Personally though, if my daughters dad was doing that, I'd be out the door before he have time to notice what I was doing.
But you have to hold it at the front of your mind that he is mistreating your daughter and it is very unfair for her to have to walk through that at her age.
Suggest the classes or anything else you can think of really, and if he refuses to do anything to change how he is near your daughter, I suggest leaving. Because really, he's like this with a 1 year infirm. How do you think he's going to be once she hits the Terrible Twos? It's one thing to properly discipline a 1 year old, it's completely different to threaten her every time she does something.
One word: divorce. Source(s): Married, with 4 kids... If my husband was similar to that, he'd be an ex, faster than he could say, "But, why?"
Answers:    the way your husband is treating your 1 year old daugher is of late plain wrong! A baby is inquisitive, demanding, curious - these are not reasons to smack them.

You need to own a serious talk with your husband about his ways - any man can father a baby but it takes a real man to be a biddable dad. It might be an idea to find a local parenting class or anger management class to help your husband concord with his emotions and help him to apprehend that your daughter is simply being a normal baby - not one especially naughty.

I wish you well Source(s): Mum of 2 near number 3 on the way
I know you guys planned her and everything but maybe he feels similar to you don't make enough time for him. Men are immature so this could be why. Maybe hold someone watch her 2 nights a week and just swing out and take a day to talk just about why he is like this with her. Its not right and its not her fault. Sometimes my husband is a short time too impatient with our children and stuff but I dont let him get too far beside it. Dont argue about it in front of her though or else she will know which one of you she can get hold of away with and cause all the attention on her. But only try and figure out what his problem is. If hes just being a dick afterwards ya you need to leave him. She is just a child and the first 5 years of her life are very very significant. Maybe if you left for a week and he realized what he lost then he may try to transmutation but more often then not...men dont change. Source(s): Married for 3 years and mom of two!
i'll be honest, i didn't even read half way through. i can't. if he is mistreating your daughter, and he is from what you are dictum, then you need to put her first and leave him. she can not receive these choices for herself, it is up to you to protect your daughter from him.
wow. that be painful to read, i cant imagine experiencing it. your husband is abusive, and sooner or subsequent he will add you to the list. first i would line up a place to stay, resembling at a friends house. tell your husband very firmly that you absolutely will not stand by another year to watch him smack your daughter around. tell him that if he does it again, you and masey are out. for gods sakes, she is still a infant! dont let him boss you or her around one more day. i am completely serious more or less this. good luck!
Ahh... divorce.. the easy answer, right up until reality kick in.

Have you considered getting some books on child development and reading them together, so he can get a better clue as to what is age appropriate at this stage within her life?

Maybe looking up some parenting classes that y'all can go to together? Would be a great instrument to spend time with one another, and yet again, another opportunity for him to get a clue.

Not adjectives men are hardwired to know what an infant is capable of, much less to have the mercy to deal with said infant in an appropriate deportment.

At this point, I'd try to stay non-confrontational, so as to not get his back up, and yet still look for ways to tutor him without it seeming like you think he's undersupplied in parental skills.

The reason I suggest doing these things together, rather than simply directing him towards them, is not that I expect you need parenting help, but more than it'll be easier for him to do, if you join contained by. Will also, hopefully, open the door to y'all have expressive discussions about what discipline policy you want to adopt together. Parents really need to be on the same page. As she may be small presently, but trust me, kids will, given the opportunity, divide and conquer. She needs both of you to be consistent.
Good luck.

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