I really involve some knowledgeable direction from elder society! Specially if your a parent?
Recently I found out who my father is, all I knew before that be his name and that he's Spanish n he lives somewhere in Europe. Anyway he's a very worthy payed architech n to be honest with I really don't get along with my own flesh and blood at all. I told my mom that I want to meet him n she told me that he doesn't want to meet me, but my mom hasn't spoken 2 him contained by 18 years so what does she know. I know for a fact that I'm his only son because he only have daughters. What should I do? even though I'm 19 now I still want to see what's like to have a father, but I'm afraid that ge will reject me or that he think that I'm after his money. My family n friends give me mixed answers. If your a father please tell me what I should do.
You're 19 now, so you can brand up your own mind.
Sit down with your mum and say to her if you can give me one valid point not to get in contact with my biological father I wont do it. She is without a doubt hiding something from you, probably to protect you.
If she cant give you a valid response. or even if she can, you should meet him anyway. You have the right to know where on earth you came from, and who you truly are. Fonding your father is all part of that.
The worst that can surface is he will reject you, (sorry to be blunt) but even if he does, you will know that you tried and that by him rejecting you he's just lost out on a son, you wouldn't have lost out on anything, he's not been near for any part of your life, and he was nevre a father to you.
Things approaching this can get messy, your mum may bad mouth him, and he may badmouth your mum - for that you say to her "consent to me learn that for myself"
For him you tell him "She brought me up, she made me who I am, don't talk bleak of her"
I hope when and if you do meet him its a happy occasion tho
Good luck
Do it! Unless he's a shitty *** person he's going to want to know how his boy is doing without him for so long.
Move to Europe even! That'd be tight!
Answers: forget it. you may not carry along with your family so well but remember, they be there for you. Your father, unfortunately was not. If he have a lot of money as you imply, he most assuredly had the resources to look you up if he be interested. you don't even need money to locate a long lost relative these days with the internet, target if he wanted to meet you he would have done so by presently.
If i were you I would forget meeting him or looking him up. Most likely you are individual setting yourself up for some major disappointment and by doing so jeopardizing your relationship with your mom, who obviously raise you on her own. No easy task I assure you, she made sacrifices for you, more so because of your "father's" inconsiderate decision to not be involved. Unfortunately the decision your "father" made to not be a part of your natural life makes him more of a sperm donor instead of a parent.
Do you really want to go chasing down some guy in hopes he will want to play dad 2 decades after the reality? You're looking for a relationship with him that just isn't possible. I'm sorry you have to wages for his bad decision making, he missed out on all the wonderful moments next to you and sadly it sounds like you are the one paying for it. You don't have to, you a short time ago have to remind yourself that it is he who missed out. he cheated himself of the joy of watching you grow up.
Be grateful for what you have instead of letting it slip from your fingers reaching for what will never be.
Good Luck and budge kiss your mom!
I would definetly want to bump into my son. You should contact him first to see what he wants to do. I think that it is awesome that you want to meet him.
In a situation between by father contained by law and his youngest son, the son doesn't want to contact him unless it is for money. It shouldn't matter whether he is well salaried or not. If it is money that you are after, there is no way that you are going to every form a relationship with him.
I do believe that you are okay intentioned in wanting to know what it is like to be a father - everyone deserves it. I say budge for it!
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Mothers - does it really get you this elated?
Was i out of file here? Was i to tricky on him? Or am i newly a impossible step mom?
You're 19 now, so you can brand up your own mind.
Sit down with your mum and say to her if you can give me one valid point not to get in contact with my biological father I wont do it. She is without a doubt hiding something from you, probably to protect you.
If she cant give you a valid response. or even if she can, you should meet him anyway. You have the right to know where on earth you came from, and who you truly are. Fonding your father is all part of that.
The worst that can surface is he will reject you, (sorry to be blunt) but even if he does, you will know that you tried and that by him rejecting you he's just lost out on a son, you wouldn't have lost out on anything, he's not been near for any part of your life, and he was nevre a father to you.
Things approaching this can get messy, your mum may bad mouth him, and he may badmouth your mum - for that you say to her "consent to me learn that for myself"
For him you tell him "She brought me up, she made me who I am, don't talk bleak of her"
I hope when and if you do meet him its a happy occasion tho
Good luck
Do it! Unless he's a shitty *** person he's going to want to know how his boy is doing without him for so long.
Move to Europe even! That'd be tight!
Answers: forget it. you may not carry along with your family so well but remember, they be there for you. Your father, unfortunately was not. If he have a lot of money as you imply, he most assuredly had the resources to look you up if he be interested. you don't even need money to locate a long lost relative these days with the internet, target if he wanted to meet you he would have done so by presently.
If i were you I would forget meeting him or looking him up. Most likely you are individual setting yourself up for some major disappointment and by doing so jeopardizing your relationship with your mom, who obviously raise you on her own. No easy task I assure you, she made sacrifices for you, more so because of your "father's" inconsiderate decision to not be involved. Unfortunately the decision your "father" made to not be a part of your natural life makes him more of a sperm donor instead of a parent.
Do you really want to go chasing down some guy in hopes he will want to play dad 2 decades after the reality? You're looking for a relationship with him that just isn't possible. I'm sorry you have to wages for his bad decision making, he missed out on all the wonderful moments next to you and sadly it sounds like you are the one paying for it. You don't have to, you a short time ago have to remind yourself that it is he who missed out. he cheated himself of the joy of watching you grow up.
Be grateful for what you have instead of letting it slip from your fingers reaching for what will never be.
Good Luck and budge kiss your mom!
I would definetly want to bump into my son. You should contact him first to see what he wants to do. I think that it is awesome that you want to meet him.
In a situation between by father contained by law and his youngest son, the son doesn't want to contact him unless it is for money. It shouldn't matter whether he is well salaried or not. If it is money that you are after, there is no way that you are going to every form a relationship with him.
I do believe that you are okay intentioned in wanting to know what it is like to be a father - everyone deserves it. I say budge for it!
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