I tolerate my 15 year older daughter live next to her best friend.?
They've been friends since they were babies. Because of the economic crisis, we have to move 3 states away in order to afford a house. She has lived in attendance her whole life. When we told her we had to move she couldn't stop crying and she threw up a couple times. We agreed to permit her live with her friend and let her finish high institution there. She's now living 500 miles away from us. Was this a bad edict. If we had taken her with us she would have run away from home.
Difficult to say. It can be a honourable thing to stay consistent in school -- different states shift at different speeds in different subjects, and often have inconstant requirements to graduate; not to mention the whole upheaval on your life thing.
But... that you consent to her stay, not because it was better for her, not because you thought she'd get a better education or hold a better shot at a good college, but because she had temper tantrums and would run away if you insisted on her staying next to the family, sounds like there's a really big problem. The child should not be calling the shots, particularly by threatening unpromising behavior if she's forced to do what she doesn't want to. How else has she controlled you, or will she continue to control you, with this type of behavior? How will she act in response if you disagree again? What would you do next time, now that she's learned how to cause you cave, if it's something more serious? (Such as, staying with a boyfriend who does drugs, or abuses her, for example.)
Yes, I think it's a bad verdict, but she knew how to push your buttons. Who is the parent here? Apparently not you. You made this decision not because of education, or because of an financial crisis or something actually important. You made the decision because she have a tantrum.
A little different scenario for me, but I have one of my sons friends living next to us right now. He already ran away from home, his father had agreed to tolerate him live with us last year and long story short he came and get him back. He says he missed him, I say it have to do with money from the state that he was no longer getting since they live blocks away and never called or come to visit. As soon as the young man turned 17 he was going to rob off again. He would have been the 4th child to do so. I offered to permit him come back here and he did. I supported him with no outside help for months. His grades go from ALL F's to C-'s and even one A and a B. Some times, doing the right thing for our children is hard to judge, but contained by this case it might actually get him into college, which will be a first for this household and would not have happened if he was couch surfing similar to he intended.
If you trust the parents, the grades are good, and the child is happy, I would rest easy until that change. I stay in a broke little town because of my kids, their whole social structure is here and they love it.
Only you can decide if it be a bad decision-she is your underage child and therefore your responsibility. Are you paying these people to angle her for you and are you making them her guardians so they can make medical decisions for her if need be?
all right my mom's makin me move to florida so I wish..
Idont think it was fruitless
My honest opinion is that I would never let my 15 year old daughter live beside anyone. I believe that it is the responsibility of the parents to care for their children at all times. You never know what goes on contained by another person's household, despite how long you have known them. What one parent may teach their child may not be what they will guide another person's child. When your a parent your own child comes first. It's an instinct. Thus in my opinion, if my daughter was surrounded by another person's household, she wouldn't be acknowledged first when it comes to her well-being or education.
I think every teenager have thought about running away from home. But after some thought or being alone on the sidewalk for a while, teenagers rethink their decision to run away.
I believe that your daughter is a bright personage and I hope you believe this too. Moving her with you would only teach her how to modify to change and deal with the world around her. Considering the monetary crisis that we are in, it would definitely teach her to overcome. The power to overcome enables one to be innovative and creative, characteristics that I believe we have lost in America.
At this moment because your daughter is not beside you, you are not the most influential person in her life. Fifteen is an exalted age. It is the beginning of becoming a woman. Your daughter needs you.
sounds like you made the right choice. lol idk
As in most states you remain totally responsible for her--good or bad. I use to work with runaways and I had tons moms tell me ---she can just go and live next to her friend if we don't mean anymore than that to her. I reminded them that they were responsible for whatever what evolve to or by her. A police officer confirmed to the parents that was true.
Why would she run away? Most teens would not run from their family.
I am going to be a mom in Sept and am 19. I don't think you made a mistake. AS long as she keeps contained by touch with you such as texting, phone calls, e-mails and visits to her untried home during the summers, vacations and holidays I think it is ok. You know the family she is living beside, so at least you know she is safe. You did what you thought was right and to be precise the only thing any parent can do. You have your daughters best interest at heart. I suppose you did what a lot of other parents would not have.
Different things work for different people. I moved out when I was 14 (for reason I won't discuss). It was the right choice for me and my parents at that time though I know a lot of people assume it was wrong simply because of the age.
Keep in close contact with your daughter, agree to her know you love her and she's always welcome in your home if things don't turn out the method she hoped they would.
Changing high schools is not good for your training. No, you did not make a mistake.
I think you did the right thing. You care about your daughter and let her have her elevated school years with the people she know.
As long as you hold full trust in that girls parents - i think you did the right thing.
Think of it resembling sending her away to boarding school.
Make her spend holidays and summers with you though. You don't want to miss the vital years of your daughters natural life.
She's obviously better without you, you MORON
Answers: What does this have to do with adoption?
You could be charged with leaving. Sorry, but too bad. You are the parent. A child has to learn to follow the rules. You are moving, she should come next to you.
If she threatened to run away, let her run away. Then, the police put her in juvie and she will see what happens to kids who do not follow the rules.
I have a daughter who threw fits and could make herself vomit if she didnt get her way. That's call a tantrum. You are not being a responsible parent.
wow, that was really nice of you.
Dont listen to hat others say your a very accurate mother, my mom has to move i might stay here where i live. i know that changing school for me is big time depression. when she gets out of highschool and gets started on life she can move next to you.
here is the bad side, you'll never know what she is doing. she might get into trouble, you wont know unless somehow it gets to youu. regard about that
what
Please don't be hurt by the opinions of the clueless.
My husband and I took within our daughter's best friend when her mom was having medical problems. It was a merriment to have her with us and in no style did we feel that her mother did anything wrong. In fact, we were honored that her mother entrusted us near her care.
Do all that you can to let your daughter know that you love her and miss her. Do somewhat something every day!
Hugs. Life will get better now that the Bush regime of horror that destroyed families is out of business.
God have gifted you with this child.. our children (im a single mother of 4!)...our children will sway, whine, and try to pursuade us.. we are to have prudence, a plan-even as a business has a plan & strategy... god wants to give you sense for those that he has entrusted you with. you are to keep her.. i know masses will disagree.. but, i speak by God inspiration.. if you ask God, he can reveal all things, people, even the right next step to hold..
im sorry..if this was a desicion from god, you'd have a real legitimate peace.. but, you dont have it for, you have stepped child out of the perfect place... i know, they influence to not uprrot children from the public school system..but, no- this system isnt even the best anyways.. im sorry.. the wisdom of god wiould tell u to take her, teach her life is like this, change come, seasons change, and this famuily is untied thru it all.. things arent as noteworthy whaatsoever, as family! this family goes thru & stays 2gether.. dont permit her learn betrayal of family..im sorry- if you hear this word..you will do well, get the impression a great peace, even if child needs to accept your god-given right of guidance and protection, this family be meant to be- if not- god would never let you have this child.
if you qualified her to not rebell at a very young age, and bring to church, raise within god, for god, and his wise will which will keep her inthe purpose of god, which will bless her socks off, next, she would not rebell- most likely.she would go with you, and cry, as we do when huge change come..
i pray you do gods will for you- not mans, not following your heart, for we know that many times if we lived by ambience, or by childs diesire( god didnt make children wise-but parents are to , and protect them) but do what is right, and by wise reasoning.. many wil disagree i enjoy found...but god always blesses those that do the hard & right thing..not the popular item... if u by faith get her back, he will organize you. she doenst have to love it or agree- i speak as a parent.. and i alwasy speak with my children, team meeting, let them know.. u love, but love is not always hugs & kisses..it is action, and coaching, gaurding their little hearts from terrible desicions, until they spill out the same wisdon that you hold been pouring in..then they are set for more freedom.this sets them up for life.. famliy is more imprtant than school..but god is more important than ancestral.. this i have learned.. and we are blessed... god will provide when you do what he loves, as he reveals..
pray over everythng that can change your ancestral, endanger them.. god has taught me that no matter how much others fastidiousness for us...no one ever covers my children as i do- he gives me sensings, gut feelings, acquaintance, and wisdom to do what is needed- we arnt perfect- but we will try, and that all we can do, and ultimately we are accountable to god, the existence giver, breath maker, and sustainer of all duration..even as the computer needs a plug, so does man, its power source is god..prophetess ANNA.. i didnt think god was material, until... V^V^..__I FLAT-LINED..DIED. & MET JESUS CHRIST.. you can know him, today- he is alive..theres no grave, and he is all powerful, able to save, requirements to walk with you, in this time, even as he sits outside of time...and requirements to bring wisdom..for all those that come to him personally, and know him, he wishes to give wisdom, as we ask him.. his WORD the bible has muchhhhhhh wisdom- its an olddddd book, but keep proven TRUE-has parental wisdom.i use it alot, and have differnet children...and dont have problems next to them, no fits, no fights, no arguments/sighing/complaining/disobedien… bad little frineds only honourable..not saying that you are differnt..but i share because of god.. he calls yiou. get your children, bump up them not according to child desires, and let god guide you, i promise, you wont regret...
no one will cover her, as you would..she will respect & luv you later for it.. you are given this right & rule, for love.. and for protection..as she have better charcter- which is to not fight you- many dont know that you can expect this.. they will love you- have merriment, peace, repect, sit, look you in the eyes as you speak, and absorb the teachings..well, i know what god say is not popular, nor accepted by many, but what he says will transform lives, and family..keep what god give 2 you- you will sleep well, and cherish your small time near her.. she is more close to her friends than your heart.. she thinks she cant separate.god wants her so close to you, that you arent trying to be friends, but, yet, you are- i cant explain fully...you whip your god-given role- have peace in your home..be happy near little, have your family..know god, love him, hear him, he will guide you- he is real- no thanks to religion...merely real relationship.just like you & your kinfolk. Source(s): prophetess ANNA..
www.myspace.com/imetjesus
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Difficult to say. It can be a honourable thing to stay consistent in school -- different states shift at different speeds in different subjects, and often have inconstant requirements to graduate; not to mention the whole upheaval on your life thing.
But... that you consent to her stay, not because it was better for her, not because you thought she'd get a better education or hold a better shot at a good college, but because she had temper tantrums and would run away if you insisted on her staying next to the family, sounds like there's a really big problem. The child should not be calling the shots, particularly by threatening unpromising behavior if she's forced to do what she doesn't want to. How else has she controlled you, or will she continue to control you, with this type of behavior? How will she act in response if you disagree again? What would you do next time, now that she's learned how to cause you cave, if it's something more serious? (Such as, staying with a boyfriend who does drugs, or abuses her, for example.)
Yes, I think it's a bad verdict, but she knew how to push your buttons. Who is the parent here? Apparently not you. You made this decision not because of education, or because of an financial crisis or something actually important. You made the decision because she have a tantrum.
A little different scenario for me, but I have one of my sons friends living next to us right now. He already ran away from home, his father had agreed to tolerate him live with us last year and long story short he came and get him back. He says he missed him, I say it have to do with money from the state that he was no longer getting since they live blocks away and never called or come to visit. As soon as the young man turned 17 he was going to rob off again. He would have been the 4th child to do so. I offered to permit him come back here and he did. I supported him with no outside help for months. His grades go from ALL F's to C-'s and even one A and a B. Some times, doing the right thing for our children is hard to judge, but contained by this case it might actually get him into college, which will be a first for this household and would not have happened if he was couch surfing similar to he intended.
If you trust the parents, the grades are good, and the child is happy, I would rest easy until that change. I stay in a broke little town because of my kids, their whole social structure is here and they love it.
Only you can decide if it be a bad decision-she is your underage child and therefore your responsibility. Are you paying these people to angle her for you and are you making them her guardians so they can make medical decisions for her if need be?
all right my mom's makin me move to florida so I wish..
Idont think it was fruitless
My honest opinion is that I would never let my 15 year old daughter live beside anyone. I believe that it is the responsibility of the parents to care for their children at all times. You never know what goes on contained by another person's household, despite how long you have known them. What one parent may teach their child may not be what they will guide another person's child. When your a parent your own child comes first. It's an instinct. Thus in my opinion, if my daughter was surrounded by another person's household, she wouldn't be acknowledged first when it comes to her well-being or education.
I think every teenager have thought about running away from home. But after some thought or being alone on the sidewalk for a while, teenagers rethink their decision to run away.
I believe that your daughter is a bright personage and I hope you believe this too. Moving her with you would only teach her how to modify to change and deal with the world around her. Considering the monetary crisis that we are in, it would definitely teach her to overcome. The power to overcome enables one to be innovative and creative, characteristics that I believe we have lost in America.
At this moment because your daughter is not beside you, you are not the most influential person in her life. Fifteen is an exalted age. It is the beginning of becoming a woman. Your daughter needs you.
sounds like you made the right choice. lol idk
As in most states you remain totally responsible for her--good or bad. I use to work with runaways and I had tons moms tell me ---she can just go and live next to her friend if we don't mean anymore than that to her. I reminded them that they were responsible for whatever what evolve to or by her. A police officer confirmed to the parents that was true.
Why would she run away? Most teens would not run from their family.
I am going to be a mom in Sept and am 19. I don't think you made a mistake. AS long as she keeps contained by touch with you such as texting, phone calls, e-mails and visits to her untried home during the summers, vacations and holidays I think it is ok. You know the family she is living beside, so at least you know she is safe. You did what you thought was right and to be precise the only thing any parent can do. You have your daughters best interest at heart. I suppose you did what a lot of other parents would not have.
Different things work for different people. I moved out when I was 14 (for reason I won't discuss). It was the right choice for me and my parents at that time though I know a lot of people assume it was wrong simply because of the age.
Keep in close contact with your daughter, agree to her know you love her and she's always welcome in your home if things don't turn out the method she hoped they would.
Changing high schools is not good for your training. No, you did not make a mistake.
I think you did the right thing. You care about your daughter and let her have her elevated school years with the people she know.
As long as you hold full trust in that girls parents - i think you did the right thing.
Think of it resembling sending her away to boarding school.
Make her spend holidays and summers with you though. You don't want to miss the vital years of your daughters natural life.
She's obviously better without you, you MORON
Answers: What does this have to do with adoption?
You could be charged with leaving. Sorry, but too bad. You are the parent. A child has to learn to follow the rules. You are moving, she should come next to you.
If she threatened to run away, let her run away. Then, the police put her in juvie and she will see what happens to kids who do not follow the rules.
I have a daughter who threw fits and could make herself vomit if she didnt get her way. That's call a tantrum. You are not being a responsible parent.
wow, that was really nice of you.
Dont listen to hat others say your a very accurate mother, my mom has to move i might stay here where i live. i know that changing school for me is big time depression. when she gets out of highschool and gets started on life she can move next to you.
here is the bad side, you'll never know what she is doing. she might get into trouble, you wont know unless somehow it gets to youu. regard about that
what
Please don't be hurt by the opinions of the clueless.
My husband and I took within our daughter's best friend when her mom was having medical problems. It was a merriment to have her with us and in no style did we feel that her mother did anything wrong. In fact, we were honored that her mother entrusted us near her care.
Do all that you can to let your daughter know that you love her and miss her. Do somewhat something every day!
Hugs. Life will get better now that the Bush regime of horror that destroyed families is out of business.
God have gifted you with this child.. our children (im a single mother of 4!)...our children will sway, whine, and try to pursuade us.. we are to have prudence, a plan-even as a business has a plan & strategy... god wants to give you sense for those that he has entrusted you with. you are to keep her.. i know masses will disagree.. but, i speak by God inspiration.. if you ask God, he can reveal all things, people, even the right next step to hold..
im sorry..if this was a desicion from god, you'd have a real legitimate peace.. but, you dont have it for, you have stepped child out of the perfect place... i know, they influence to not uprrot children from the public school system..but, no- this system isnt even the best anyways.. im sorry.. the wisdom of god wiould tell u to take her, teach her life is like this, change come, seasons change, and this famuily is untied thru it all.. things arent as noteworthy whaatsoever, as family! this family goes thru & stays 2gether.. dont permit her learn betrayal of family..im sorry- if you hear this word..you will do well, get the impression a great peace, even if child needs to accept your god-given right of guidance and protection, this family be meant to be- if not- god would never let you have this child.
if you qualified her to not rebell at a very young age, and bring to church, raise within god, for god, and his wise will which will keep her inthe purpose of god, which will bless her socks off, next, she would not rebell- most likely.she would go with you, and cry, as we do when huge change come..
i pray you do gods will for you- not mans, not following your heart, for we know that many times if we lived by ambience, or by childs diesire( god didnt make children wise-but parents are to , and protect them) but do what is right, and by wise reasoning.. many wil disagree i enjoy found...but god always blesses those that do the hard & right thing..not the popular item... if u by faith get her back, he will organize you. she doenst have to love it or agree- i speak as a parent.. and i alwasy speak with my children, team meeting, let them know.. u love, but love is not always hugs & kisses..it is action, and coaching, gaurding their little hearts from terrible desicions, until they spill out the same wisdon that you hold been pouring in..then they are set for more freedom.this sets them up for life.. famliy is more imprtant than school..but god is more important than ancestral.. this i have learned.. and we are blessed... god will provide when you do what he loves, as he reveals..
pray over everythng that can change your ancestral, endanger them.. god has taught me that no matter how much others fastidiousness for us...no one ever covers my children as i do- he gives me sensings, gut feelings, acquaintance, and wisdom to do what is needed- we arnt perfect- but we will try, and that all we can do, and ultimately we are accountable to god, the existence giver, breath maker, and sustainer of all duration..even as the computer needs a plug, so does man, its power source is god..prophetess ANNA.. i didnt think god was material, until... V^V^..__I FLAT-LINED..DIED. & MET JESUS CHRIST.. you can know him, today- he is alive..theres no grave, and he is all powerful, able to save, requirements to walk with you, in this time, even as he sits outside of time...and requirements to bring wisdom..for all those that come to him personally, and know him, he wishes to give wisdom, as we ask him.. his WORD the bible has muchhhhhhh wisdom- its an olddddd book, but keep proven TRUE-has parental wisdom.i use it alot, and have differnet children...and dont have problems next to them, no fits, no fights, no arguments/sighing/complaining/disobedien… bad little frineds only honourable..not saying that you are differnt..but i share because of god.. he calls yiou. get your children, bump up them not according to child desires, and let god guide you, i promise, you wont regret...
no one will cover her, as you would..she will respect & luv you later for it.. you are given this right & rule, for love.. and for protection..as she have better charcter- which is to not fight you- many dont know that you can expect this.. they will love you- have merriment, peace, repect, sit, look you in the eyes as you speak, and absorb the teachings..well, i know what god say is not popular, nor accepted by many, but what he says will transform lives, and family..keep what god give 2 you- you will sleep well, and cherish your small time near her.. she is more close to her friends than your heart.. she thinks she cant separate.god wants her so close to you, that you arent trying to be friends, but, yet, you are- i cant explain fully...you whip your god-given role- have peace in your home..be happy near little, have your family..know god, love him, hear him, he will guide you- he is real- no thanks to religion...merely real relationship.just like you & your kinfolk. Source(s): prophetess ANNA..
www.myspace.com/imetjesus
Related Questions: