Do some adoptees use their adoptive parents as scapegoats?
I do not do this. My parents are my heroes. But do you not think that some angry adoptees unnecessarily blame all their woes on their adoptive parents?
I blame the multiple scars on my face on my adoptive mother. She is the one who gave them to me. I blame her for raise me to fear people. I blame her for a number of things I won't discuss here. She have nothing to do with my adoption. She didn't put me up for adoption. She wanted a child, I be the child she got. My adoption is separate from anything she ever did to me.
I would consider my a-father a hero. I don't base this off of the reality that he adopted me, but because of the man he has proved to be.
I blame the sadness I grain when I look in the mirror and see my scarred face on my a-mom. I blame the melancholy I feel from my adoption on the industry who perpetrated the lies and deception and separation that I enjoy lived with my whole life. I fully endorse that my having a crappy mother has nothing to do near my being adopted. Source(s): Adoptee, mother of 5
I think some race in general use their parents as scapegoats, not exclusively adoptees. I know several people who do, and the majority (and the most blatant examples) are not adopt.
On the other hand, some people-- particularly those abused and neglected, but also those whose emotional wants weren't met or who were lied to-- have genuine grievances against their parents, and their lives truly ARE negatively artificial still by things their parents did. Not all parents are wonderful, adoptive or biological, and acknowledging that is purely honest, not malicious.
Relationships with parents are complicated things at times for human beings in broad. Scapegoating parents unfairly happens, and it isn't healthy, but it's not an adoption point as far as I can tell... it's a family dynamics issue that can come up in any type of nearest and dearest.
If they don't consequently they should. Infertiles who imprison children for 18 years deserve all the misery they get.
You again.
"Do some adoptees use their adoptive parents as scapegoats?"
I don't and I don't know any that do.
"My parents are my heroes."
Thats good for you, do you want an award?
"But do you not think that some angry adoptees unnecessarily blame adjectives their woes on their adoptive parents?"
ALL? Nope.
SOME? Maybe
UNNECESSARILY? WOES? If you are going to bring up a stuff, its common practice in the real world to cite examples.
Now, O-Ollie.
Do you blame adjectives your woes on adoptee's wanting their records unsealed and those who dont believe in unethical adoption practices?
Me, think you do.
My aparents are people. I don't blame them--I suggest they were duped, too.
I blame the man-made invention that is adoption. Source(s): Adoption is a preventible disorder
I know you are trying to be baiting, but there's zilch good on TV.
Blaming parents is nothing new and is to be sure not the sole province of adoptees. Our parents are the ones who are supposed to help build our confidence and give us a sense of self cultivated through competent parenting consisiting of love and discipline and stability and safety.
No parents are superlative but the vast majority do the best they can. Unfortunately sometimes even the best parents can have a negative impact on their child's sense of self, which can help yourself to the now-adult years to combat.
But ultimately it is the individual's responsibility to carve out their own life. We make our own decision about how we want our lives to be and we cannot blame anyone for that... not even parents.
We all know there is a subset of general public who completely absolve themselves of responsibility for all things and blame everyone for their own problems and that can be parents, teachers, employers, friends, etc. That is a behaviour flaw.
Sigh. You again, huh?
Bad parents are bad parents, be they adoptive or biological. Abusive parenting is inexcusable, regardless of how the child became a member of the relations.
I'm sure some people do this, but at the end of the day, our lives belong to us, and we clear our choices as adults. I'm sure most adult adoptees are not over-simplifying this issue as you are.
Having been abused should not negatively reflect on adoption any more than (for example) my have had amazing parents should reflect positively on adoption. It just...is. You carry the parents you get, adoptive or not. I don't think abusive parents should be excused from any of that responsibility by their abused children blaming adoption for the problem. Abuse is verbal abuse, plain and simple. Source(s): Adult Adoptee/Adoptive/Foster Mom
Blah, blah, blah.
I`m not about to bow down to someone who caused me so much misery. If your parents be saints so be it but mine weren`t and I won`t be saying any different just to make the like of you happy.
Answers: Jesus, I am glad that when I go looking for the child I surrendered to adoption, I didn't find you at the end of my search.
at the end of the day everyone different and have different circumstances not everyone has been adopted or put into the adoption proses at birth some relations would remember they re birth parents (good or bad) so its impossible to put everyone in the same boat!
Yes. My children regularly tie me up and beat me with sticks whenever they are woeful.
I know I do. I mean, for cr@ps sake, my ap's drink boxed wine and smoke Basic Menthols. I approaching premiums. I got gypped.
i'm sure some do, but none that frequent here. Why on earth would a person who's eye socket was crushed, fingers broken, etc.. give an account a story of happy adoption. It isn't using them as a scape goat, its letting others know that there are some really bad ancestors out there adopting.
I have without a doubt that if you as a child had your fingers broken, your eye socket crushed by the people who were supposed to love you forever and even better than what your first parents would hold, you would be posting a whole different rant.
My birthdaughter loves her parents and she loves me too.
Sure, some do. Some bio kids use their bio parents as scapegoats as well. This goes next to the territory of parenting. Frankly, some parents deserve it. Some don't
And your point is?
Yes.
I'm sure some do.
Yes!
**Sly,I own no doubt that works both ways!**
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I blame the multiple scars on my face on my adoptive mother. She is the one who gave them to me. I blame her for raise me to fear people. I blame her for a number of things I won't discuss here. She have nothing to do with my adoption. She didn't put me up for adoption. She wanted a child, I be the child she got. My adoption is separate from anything she ever did to me.
I would consider my a-father a hero. I don't base this off of the reality that he adopted me, but because of the man he has proved to be.
I blame the sadness I grain when I look in the mirror and see my scarred face on my a-mom. I blame the melancholy I feel from my adoption on the industry who perpetrated the lies and deception and separation that I enjoy lived with my whole life. I fully endorse that my having a crappy mother has nothing to do near my being adopted. Source(s): Adoptee, mother of 5
I think some race in general use their parents as scapegoats, not exclusively adoptees. I know several people who do, and the majority (and the most blatant examples) are not adopt.
On the other hand, some people-- particularly those abused and neglected, but also those whose emotional wants weren't met or who were lied to-- have genuine grievances against their parents, and their lives truly ARE negatively artificial still by things their parents did. Not all parents are wonderful, adoptive or biological, and acknowledging that is purely honest, not malicious.
Relationships with parents are complicated things at times for human beings in broad. Scapegoating parents unfairly happens, and it isn't healthy, but it's not an adoption point as far as I can tell... it's a family dynamics issue that can come up in any type of nearest and dearest.
If they don't consequently they should. Infertiles who imprison children for 18 years deserve all the misery they get.
You again.
"Do some adoptees use their adoptive parents as scapegoats?"
I don't and I don't know any that do.
"My parents are my heroes."
Thats good for you, do you want an award?
"But do you not think that some angry adoptees unnecessarily blame adjectives their woes on their adoptive parents?"
ALL? Nope.
SOME? Maybe
UNNECESSARILY? WOES? If you are going to bring up a stuff, its common practice in the real world to cite examples.
Now, O-Ollie.
Do you blame adjectives your woes on adoptee's wanting their records unsealed and those who dont believe in unethical adoption practices?
Me, think you do.
My aparents are people. I don't blame them--I suggest they were duped, too.
I blame the man-made invention that is adoption. Source(s): Adoption is a preventible disorder
I know you are trying to be baiting, but there's zilch good on TV.
Blaming parents is nothing new and is to be sure not the sole province of adoptees. Our parents are the ones who are supposed to help build our confidence and give us a sense of self cultivated through competent parenting consisiting of love and discipline and stability and safety.
No parents are superlative but the vast majority do the best they can. Unfortunately sometimes even the best parents can have a negative impact on their child's sense of self, which can help yourself to the now-adult years to combat.
But ultimately it is the individual's responsibility to carve out their own life. We make our own decision about how we want our lives to be and we cannot blame anyone for that... not even parents.
We all know there is a subset of general public who completely absolve themselves of responsibility for all things and blame everyone for their own problems and that can be parents, teachers, employers, friends, etc. That is a behaviour flaw.
Sigh. You again, huh?
Bad parents are bad parents, be they adoptive or biological. Abusive parenting is inexcusable, regardless of how the child became a member of the relations.
I'm sure some people do this, but at the end of the day, our lives belong to us, and we clear our choices as adults. I'm sure most adult adoptees are not over-simplifying this issue as you are.
Having been abused should not negatively reflect on adoption any more than (for example) my have had amazing parents should reflect positively on adoption. It just...is. You carry the parents you get, adoptive or not. I don't think abusive parents should be excused from any of that responsibility by their abused children blaming adoption for the problem. Abuse is verbal abuse, plain and simple. Source(s): Adult Adoptee/Adoptive/Foster Mom
Blah, blah, blah.
I`m not about to bow down to someone who caused me so much misery. If your parents be saints so be it but mine weren`t and I won`t be saying any different just to make the like of you happy.
Answers: Jesus, I am glad that when I go looking for the child I surrendered to adoption, I didn't find you at the end of my search.
at the end of the day everyone different and have different circumstances not everyone has been adopted or put into the adoption proses at birth some relations would remember they re birth parents (good or bad) so its impossible to put everyone in the same boat!
Yes. My children regularly tie me up and beat me with sticks whenever they are woeful.
I know I do. I mean, for cr@ps sake, my ap's drink boxed wine and smoke Basic Menthols. I approaching premiums. I got gypped.
i'm sure some do, but none that frequent here. Why on earth would a person who's eye socket was crushed, fingers broken, etc.. give an account a story of happy adoption. It isn't using them as a scape goat, its letting others know that there are some really bad ancestors out there adopting.
I have without a doubt that if you as a child had your fingers broken, your eye socket crushed by the people who were supposed to love you forever and even better than what your first parents would hold, you would be posting a whole different rant.
My birthdaughter loves her parents and she loves me too.
Sure, some do. Some bio kids use their bio parents as scapegoats as well. This goes next to the territory of parenting. Frankly, some parents deserve it. Some don't
And your point is?
Yes.
I'm sure some do.
Yes!
**Sly,I own no doubt that works both ways!**
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