If you have an adopt child, would you stop them from inquiring for their biological parents?
I would never stop them. I would offer to support there scour in any way I could. It is important for everyone to know their roots, adopt and natural.
I wouldn't automatically assume that a child would be surrounded by danger from their biological parents, but if I had a reason to believe that would be the suitcase, it is a parent's job to protect their child.
If this were not the case (and I'm sure the massive majority of reunions don't involve physical danger to a child), then I would fully support searching and reunion, human being involved as much or as little as my child wanted. The same as if my child was no longer a minor.
Answers: I haven't adopted but I do believe it is morally wrong to stop an adopted adult from questioning no matter why they were adopted. It's as desperate as adoptive parents who believe it's okay to lie and not tell their children they are adopted.
I do apprehend why adoptive parents would hold concerns if their child had been removed from their natural parents due to their lifestyles or if at hand had been abuse. However the right point to do is to be supportive and let their child know they are there for them.
ETA. My son believed I didn't want him but still searched as he considered necessary to find out info and if we were anything alike. He found out the truth that I was pressured so if an adoptee searches they enjoy a chance to find out the truth as to why they were adopted.
No, I have always been curious myself more or less who gave me birth and what why they couldn't keep me. I won't search because I know it's simply impossible (there's like 1 billion people in China!) but it's something that will other be a mystery that I dream occasionally.
On the other hand even if they did meet their biological parents you will still be their parents because you are the people that took safekeeping of them, loved them, fed them, showed them how to live, their shoulder to cry on, their unfathomable love supply, their haven, their everything.
I would just tell them what I know about them, If they were drug heads I would only just tell them and let them find them and form their own opinion..
I would stop a CHILD from searching only if they be in danger of physical or psychological harm, for example if they be removed from the home for abuse in the first place. (If there is no peril of harm, I support contact, and the majority of children can have that contact safely.) A parent have a responsibility to keep their children safe.
An ADULT has the right to brand name those decisions for themselves, though I would make sure I was in that to help and support if things went wrong.
Naw.
I would really help them, i want to know the function why
the parents left them and let my kid see them.
Now if the parents PROMISED to take contemplation of my kid i would
let him/her sleep over their house and see how it goes.
After awhile i would keep them in that because its there real parents
Than i would take them spinal column or maybe live close.
The more family the better, right?
(=
In the very rare instance that finding their bio-parents would credible result in physical harm to them, I would share my concerns with them and try to backing them find other ways to get some of the answers they need. But, provided that they are an adult, if they know adjectives the facts available and still want to search, I would encourage them and help them find not detrimental ways to do so.
And if my child were of the other 99.99% of the adopted population who don't risk "physical threat" by searching, consequently of course I would support them completely.
Depends if they were drugies or something like that after i may warn them never stop them
I was adopted over 40 years ago and about 5 years ago I contracted to trace my birth family before I lost the chance forever. My adoptive mum be dead and my adoptive father and sister supported my decision - we discussed it in detail.
After a long rummage through, I found my birth mother - a Lovely lady who was forced to have me adopt as she was deaf and had epilepsy ( grounds for forced adoption in the 60s). That week, my adoptive household disowned me - the last thing my dad said to me was that he never considered necessary to see me or my children again - he never will.
I thought I had a supportive stable family, but they were going through the motions of supporting me while stealthily resenting my right to know my roots. My Aunt has actually said to me that once I was adopt I was OWNED by her family and had betrayed them by trying to find my roots. Never ever stop a child from doing this - it'll merely backfire on you. I was over whelmed by love and gratitude to my adoptive family when I found my birth mum - and then inside days they rejected me. It's all so sad and stupid. They have a right to choose - trust them to do it.
They have the right to. As long as they are over the age of 18 they can choose if they want to or not! No I wouldn't stop them
In broad no. If my child comes to me at as young as 12 or 13 and says they want to search I will help out them any way I can.
As the adult responsible for a minor, yes I would stop them from searching if near was a possibility of a physical threat towards them. As the parent it is my job to make sure they are undisruptive.
Now, when the child becomes an adult I would support them and their search 100%.
Why the automatic assumption that at hand may be physical threats? Why does everyone buy into that crap? Is there a history of violence toward the child? Is this still a child or is it an adult very soon who is searching?
I cannot believe that people just automatically assumes that the inherent parents are going to be a danger to their child. Buy into any other BOGUS stereotypes lately? Source(s): ETA: BooMama, who peed in your Post Toasties? I guess maybe you didn't see the ? at the closing stages of that sentence, or maybe you were not aware that that symbol indicated a question. Either course, there you go a-ss-u-ming and you know what that makes YOU.
well i plan to adopt my nephew surrounded by a year or 2 and he will know that i adopted him and that his mother gave up parental rights and his father died. if he wants to know his genuine mother than i will not stop him unless his life is at danger. and i think if he is below the age of 11 when he asks to see her i will say no as he is too young to understand the undamaged situation.
What a hilarious question. Most adoptees are NOT from wounding families. I think most people verbs more about how adoptive parents will feel. As you can see from Catherine's answer, MANY ap's turn their backs on their adoptive children when they query. It makes no sense that they cannot accept the fact we can love adjectives four of our parents, especially since most of our ap's have more than one child.
If it is a minor child, and they were removed from their f Mom's care because of mishandle, then of course, that is a different story. But once that child is over 18, an ap have NO SAY in what they do.
Ap's need to EXPECT that their adoptee will search. Most of us do. If they cant button that, they should not adopt.
Pfffft NO.
What make you think you can stop them anyway? They have rights you know, the right to free association, the right to have relations near whom ever they choose? Sound familar? Their the same rights you have.
Why do people construe because they OWN an adoptee they have the right to control their entire life?
ETA: Boomama, does that mean you'll be ignore my questions and answers from now on? or maybe blocking me, I'll live. Maybe you shouldn't run it to heart if it doesn't pertain to you, just like i have stated various many times.
No I would not attempt to stop them.------always keeping my info up to date on the other family. It was not a happy reunion by adjectives reports and my daughter was kicked around and got the final kick ---she told me. Nothing have changed in the years she has been gone. So unfortunate for this young woman. Bit We are as always still here.
I only will she could have found such peace and happiness as I read here but she didn't.
I am happy for the ones where on earth it works out BUT that is not always the case.
If they knew they be adopted and were willing to find out who their bio-parents are I would noticeably let them. They will always hold a love for you regardless of the fact, you are the one taking strictness and nourishing them.
Are you speaking of a minor child or an adult?
If an adult...it's simply none of the adoptive parents business, unless the full-grown person who was adopted as a child, chooses to inform you of his/her intent. I chew over adults are quite qualified to handle their own affairs. If there is a 'threat' of physical wound..I am sure that the 'adult' will know of the proper authorities to contact.
If a minor.have a long heart to heart talk with the adopt child and really listen to his/her 'feelings' for wanting to search. And I would not assume a 'threat' is imminent...unless you have verifiable proof that one of the biological parents have threatened to harm their child.
nope, I would never try to stop them from having a relationship with their fluent families. Source(s): adult adoptee
I don't see how that would be possible, aside from imprisoning them. If an adult wishes to contact another adult, there's no reason for them not to.
Sure, you could guilt trip them, or hide their information from them, or do adjectives kinds of other shady things that aren't your place, but if the adoptee still wanted to find their roots, there are ways. There are adoptees whose parents won't even confess to them that they were adopted, and they STILL find ways to get their information and connect near their family.
No I would not stop them,I would dispense them help and support if that is what they want to do.
First, just as Lori said, I don't own my child, and my parents didn't own me, so, stop them? No.
My daughter's first mother be abusive, and while I wouldn't permit unsupervised access while she is this little and vulnerable, I trust that as an full-grown, she would not put herself in harm's way unnecessarily, so, still no.
A person (adopted or not) have the right to know things about themselves, and no other person has the right to withhold or prevent access to that information. Source(s): Adoptee and AP - Never surrounded by captivity
Not until they were ripened enough to really know that there is a possible danger. Then i would agree to them make that choice and find their biological parents together. :/
If there were some sort of physical trouble, I would have her wait until she is 18.
Otherwise I would never stop an adopted personage from looking for their biological family. As an adopted person I make out how important your bio family is.
No I wouldn't. I don't know if it would mete out a physical threat to them I might encourage against it.
my oldest son is adopt i never wanted him to know he was adopted
not for my self but to protect him. but once he turned 10 and everyone started recounting him how much he looks like his uncle i figured it would be best to tell the truth.i would aversion to have lied and him find out later
its been complicated for both him and me my brother and his wife now have a 5
year old and my son is 13 and he asked me purely last week why they got rid of him and keep the other one i love my son next to everything i am
and to be honest with him and see the pain he goes through hurts me
but it would hurt even more if he grew up sense like he had a dishonest
mother
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