A regretful poem give or take a few go and friendship?
I thought you accepted me, for who I really am. Then, in the distance, back stabbed me. BAM! BAM!
I thought we have a friendship, but I guess I was wrong. My feelings won't go within song.
What did I do? Who am I? Is this really worth my time?
The feeling comes, and is always there, that I'm basically not good enough, for anyone to care.
Failure is dominate, nouns is the opposite. This is ment to be.
Do I have others, or are they bothers? This can not be seen.
Is time it time to stop charitable? Time to set free? I don't know, but maybe it's ment to be.
GOOD.
some lines are good while some arent. heres some suggestions:
1) i thought you acceoted me for who i really am, but its really was just rather scam
2)i thought we had a frienship, but i guess i was wrong. why did all the emotional state feel so strong ?
3)is good i like it (:
4) i really resembling this one too but you need to change is to are
5)is good
6) i dont see how this fits surrounded by
7) change "maybe its meant to be" to "perchance its not meant to be"
i used most of your words soo .. i hope i helped but didnt change to much (:
Answers: I didn't feel sad...
You didn't formulate it visual, or make it appeal to any senses. You need to draw out your vocabulary. Try to avoid such common things such as "But I guess", or "I don't know". They're pointless. They don't display emotion well at adjectives.
"Failure is dominate, success is the opposite." this is pretty good. I approaching this line.
But overall the poem just has too heaps holes. I don't understand the point of it--and it's important that you make it clear. But overall, pretty biddable.
It wasnt glum to me
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I thought we have a friendship, but I guess I was wrong. My feelings won't go within song.
What did I do? Who am I? Is this really worth my time?
The feeling comes, and is always there, that I'm basically not good enough, for anyone to care.
Failure is dominate, nouns is the opposite. This is ment to be.
Do I have others, or are they bothers? This can not be seen.
Is time it time to stop charitable? Time to set free? I don't know, but maybe it's ment to be.
GOOD.
some lines are good while some arent. heres some suggestions:
1) i thought you acceoted me for who i really am, but its really was just rather scam
2)i thought we had a frienship, but i guess i was wrong. why did all the emotional state feel so strong ?
3)is good i like it (:
4) i really resembling this one too but you need to change is to are
5)is good
6) i dont see how this fits surrounded by
7) change "maybe its meant to be" to "perchance its not meant to be"
i used most of your words soo .. i hope i helped but didnt change to much (:
Answers: I didn't feel sad...
You didn't formulate it visual, or make it appeal to any senses. You need to draw out your vocabulary. Try to avoid such common things such as "But I guess", or "I don't know". They're pointless. They don't display emotion well at adjectives.
"Failure is dominate, success is the opposite." this is pretty good. I approaching this line.
But overall the poem just has too heaps holes. I don't understand the point of it--and it's important that you make it clear. But overall, pretty biddable.
It wasnt glum to me
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