15 y/o daughter caught drinking AGAIN!!?
She was caught the first time in April. We grounded her for 2 1/2 months no phone,computer,friends. She has very soon been ungrounded for less than 1 month and last hours of darkness she was drinking again. She says that she doesn't know why she was drinking it be just fun. She is an A-B student VERY involved in school (Cheer/Sports/ABS/Decca). We own talked with her MANY times about drinking, drugs, sex. We are of late at our wits end we don't want to over do it but we also want her to know that this is unacceptable. She will now be grounded til lord know when and we are making her quit cheer (something that is a huge part of her) She will be meeting near her coach this Thurs and we are making her explain why she can not do it this year. Is that to harsh? We want her to be involved but also want her to realize that her actions will have HARSH consequences. Also she will not be taking drivers ed this tip out as planned and want to wait until she is 16 until she can take it (next April) ALSO she is not allowed to close her bedroom door (because she lost our trust so accordingly doesn't deserve privacy, She can change in the bathroom), and no phone computer or leave the house lacking us. Are we being unreasonable? My husband and I are very upset with her but also miserable. We hate doing this but we don't know what else to do to make her understand. Any warning would be helpful!
its stern but understandable
but in most cases once kids start they dont usually stop, its hard to brand name them understand
unfortunatly for most it just becomes chunk of life for them, and as parents its going to be up to you wether you fight this losing battle or wether you ponder you may still be able to instill your values in her.
perhaps you could show her AA school assembly or homeless people statistics, many are alchoholics, as well as drunk driving quirk pictures, those are SCARY
good luck
you could look around town for public speaking helpers. i know here where i live there be a tragic accident with 4 teenagers drinking and driving and there saloon crashed killing all 4 kids and decapitating one of the now in attendance family and friends of the kids go around talking around the consequences of drinking
I agree 100 percent wit everything you are doing this is the only means of access she is going to learn...little girls this day need to revise. I my self am young I will be 18 in sept. But i have a 16 year infirm sister that I take care of. And she is coming of the age where she think its cute to drink and smoke and I am not going. I took her phone and she cant go anywhere she also is hanging around the wrong people. That why I'm sending her to opening core...I feel that this is the best place for her...But keep being the correct mother that you are. And keep pointing her in the right way...And I preference you much luck... Source(s): **Kayla C**
when i turned 14, my parents allowed me to drink as long as they knew i be doing so. They give me a certain amount and thats my lot for the week. If you have a system resembling this, i think it is less likely that she will drink minus telling you.
You are being to harsh. Was she out drinking or at home? My parents enjoy always said that they'd rather me drink at home then at some shindig and get hurt.
I was 15 when I started drinking. And it caught up with me and I have to face the consequences of it! And that's what you should let her do
To be honest I dont think thats harsh at all.
You told her the first time and she didnt listen very soon you have to do this to make her understand. She have to understand that terrible things happen to underage drinkers and the consequences are profusely worse then not having your phone.
just save on grounding her until shes learned her lesson.find out whos selling it till her.
hey, she's got to cram the rules some how. apparently, she's hard-headed like i was so maybe one what you call harsh will drill some sense into her.
Most people don't drive at all until that time 16. Thats not a punishment.
I have a really good friend and when I come to her house, I drink with her and her mom. Her mom doesn't enjoy a problem with it, so neither does mine.
I think you are overreacting. Your teen daughter was drinking beside an adult in the house. Instead of saying "never drink", make clear to her not to drink while driving, not to ride with drunk people, and she may listen instead of write you off as some horrible strict parent.
My bro did the same thing. He still drinks, like mad. i would try to help her now before she receive addicted. My dad also drank, it killed him.DESTROYED his liver. I suggest AA meetings if your that concerned. Or just keep hold of an eye on her. Show her how much it worries you.
Don't make her quit cheer! It's something that she likes to do, keep her physically fit and in a safe social environment. Take that away from her and she's just going to start hate you and get in to more drinking. Although I agree it is "unacceptable" behavior, you also have to remember not to over take action, most teenagers experiment with drinking. The best thing you can do is have a settle with her. Ask her why she's been drinking behind your support and let her know your reasons for not wanting her to drink. Don't just communicate her "YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DRINK BECAUSE I SAID SO". My parents pull that card every once and a while and it drives me crazy! Give her legitimate reasons close to how it could effect her health, development and other mental aspects. Another thing that will serve is compromise. Maybe allow her a little glass of wine with dinner every once and a while. I can honestly update you from experience that when teens are *allowed* to drink, they usually don't. Part of the fun of teenage drinking is going behind your parent's back and acting crazy. My parent's friend allows her 16 year feeble son a can of beer every once and a while. When I go out with him he never drinks because it's nothing hot to experiment with and he already knows how it tastes and what his alcohol decrease is. Just something to think about. Also keep her contained by lots of extra curricular activities to distract her from rebellious behavior. On the weekends offer to drive her and pick her up from the movies or enjoy a couple friends over your house. That way you know that she is safe, but she is still having fun so she won't be tempt to drink. Don't be too harsh, try to put yourself in her position. Good luck! Source(s): 15 :)
Answers: I wouldn't make her quit cheer.
She needs to stay involved beside those kinds of things. If she isn't involved with those kind of things I can make clear to you its going to go downhill quickly.
I do think she should be grounded.
Priviledges taken away and such.
Cheer should stay though. For her physical and mental form.
I would just stick to her being grounded, no computer, no phone, always beside you. Can only leave for school, cheer and beside one of you.
Just I am telling you now...taking away cheer is a HORRIBLE result.
Good Luck
I can understand the drivers ed thing, and I understand the no privacy item, but I don't understand why you'd take cheer away from her. That would keep her busy and involved. If you clutch it away, she has more free time to get into trouble with. They other say getting into extra curricular activities is a GOOD thing, so I wouldn't pocket that away.
Think about this though...
Why is your daughter drinking? She obviously knows why.
Is it because she's stressed? Bored? Craving attention? Trying to hold fun? Wanting to be like her friends? Finding her trigger will without a doubt help.
you cant shut past its sell-by date your 15 year olds life. if my parents did that to me i would be depressed. i got caught drinking and was grounded for one week. that kill me, i was very sad adjectives day and drudged around. i learned my lesson. you cant make her quit cheer, afterwards she'll have nothing to distract her. you should get her more involved contained by things so she gets distracted. let her have friends over and sleepovers, but solely at your house so you can keep on eye on them. yes, i think, as a 15 year old girl myself, you are self too harsh.
if you ban her from everything she likes..especially cheer if it finances so much to her she's going to rebel BIG TIME! your daughter probably feels that if she doesn't go out drinking after her friends won't accept her...you said your daughter was an a/b student so obviously the girl have a lot of sense she will probably learn from her own mistakes,grounding never really works bcuz if my parents tryed to ground me i wuld have flipped and rebeled aswel!try giving her smaller quantity pocket money bcuz if she doesn't have the money to pay for the drink not many relatives are willing to share with her!
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its stern but understandable
but in most cases once kids start they dont usually stop, its hard to brand name them understand
unfortunatly for most it just becomes chunk of life for them, and as parents its going to be up to you wether you fight this losing battle or wether you ponder you may still be able to instill your values in her.
perhaps you could show her AA school assembly or homeless people statistics, many are alchoholics, as well as drunk driving quirk pictures, those are SCARY
good luck
you could look around town for public speaking helpers. i know here where i live there be a tragic accident with 4 teenagers drinking and driving and there saloon crashed killing all 4 kids and decapitating one of the now in attendance family and friends of the kids go around talking around the consequences of drinking
I agree 100 percent wit everything you are doing this is the only means of access she is going to learn...little girls this day need to revise. I my self am young I will be 18 in sept. But i have a 16 year infirm sister that I take care of. And she is coming of the age where she think its cute to drink and smoke and I am not going. I took her phone and she cant go anywhere she also is hanging around the wrong people. That why I'm sending her to opening core...I feel that this is the best place for her...But keep being the correct mother that you are. And keep pointing her in the right way...And I preference you much luck... Source(s): **Kayla C**
when i turned 14, my parents allowed me to drink as long as they knew i be doing so. They give me a certain amount and thats my lot for the week. If you have a system resembling this, i think it is less likely that she will drink minus telling you.
You are being to harsh. Was she out drinking or at home? My parents enjoy always said that they'd rather me drink at home then at some shindig and get hurt.
I was 15 when I started drinking. And it caught up with me and I have to face the consequences of it! And that's what you should let her do
To be honest I dont think thats harsh at all.
You told her the first time and she didnt listen very soon you have to do this to make her understand. She have to understand that terrible things happen to underage drinkers and the consequences are profusely worse then not having your phone.
just save on grounding her until shes learned her lesson.find out whos selling it till her.
hey, she's got to cram the rules some how. apparently, she's hard-headed like i was so maybe one what you call harsh will drill some sense into her.
Most people don't drive at all until that time 16. Thats not a punishment.
I have a really good friend and when I come to her house, I drink with her and her mom. Her mom doesn't enjoy a problem with it, so neither does mine.
I think you are overreacting. Your teen daughter was drinking beside an adult in the house. Instead of saying "never drink", make clear to her not to drink while driving, not to ride with drunk people, and she may listen instead of write you off as some horrible strict parent.
My bro did the same thing. He still drinks, like mad. i would try to help her now before she receive addicted. My dad also drank, it killed him.DESTROYED his liver. I suggest AA meetings if your that concerned. Or just keep hold of an eye on her. Show her how much it worries you.
Don't make her quit cheer! It's something that she likes to do, keep her physically fit and in a safe social environment. Take that away from her and she's just going to start hate you and get in to more drinking. Although I agree it is "unacceptable" behavior, you also have to remember not to over take action, most teenagers experiment with drinking. The best thing you can do is have a settle with her. Ask her why she's been drinking behind your support and let her know your reasons for not wanting her to drink. Don't just communicate her "YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DRINK BECAUSE I SAID SO". My parents pull that card every once and a while and it drives me crazy! Give her legitimate reasons close to how it could effect her health, development and other mental aspects. Another thing that will serve is compromise. Maybe allow her a little glass of wine with dinner every once and a while. I can honestly update you from experience that when teens are *allowed* to drink, they usually don't. Part of the fun of teenage drinking is going behind your parent's back and acting crazy. My parent's friend allows her 16 year feeble son a can of beer every once and a while. When I go out with him he never drinks because it's nothing hot to experiment with and he already knows how it tastes and what his alcohol decrease is. Just something to think about. Also keep her contained by lots of extra curricular activities to distract her from rebellious behavior. On the weekends offer to drive her and pick her up from the movies or enjoy a couple friends over your house. That way you know that she is safe, but she is still having fun so she won't be tempt to drink. Don't be too harsh, try to put yourself in her position. Good luck! Source(s): 15 :)
Answers: I wouldn't make her quit cheer.
She needs to stay involved beside those kinds of things. If she isn't involved with those kind of things I can make clear to you its going to go downhill quickly.
I do think she should be grounded.
Priviledges taken away and such.
Cheer should stay though. For her physical and mental form.
I would just stick to her being grounded, no computer, no phone, always beside you. Can only leave for school, cheer and beside one of you.
Just I am telling you now...taking away cheer is a HORRIBLE result.
Good Luck
I can understand the drivers ed thing, and I understand the no privacy item, but I don't understand why you'd take cheer away from her. That would keep her busy and involved. If you clutch it away, she has more free time to get into trouble with. They other say getting into extra curricular activities is a GOOD thing, so I wouldn't pocket that away.
Think about this though...
Why is your daughter drinking? She obviously knows why.
Is it because she's stressed? Bored? Craving attention? Trying to hold fun? Wanting to be like her friends? Finding her trigger will without a doubt help.
you cant shut past its sell-by date your 15 year olds life. if my parents did that to me i would be depressed. i got caught drinking and was grounded for one week. that kill me, i was very sad adjectives day and drudged around. i learned my lesson. you cant make her quit cheer, afterwards she'll have nothing to distract her. you should get her more involved contained by things so she gets distracted. let her have friends over and sleepovers, but solely at your house so you can keep on eye on them. yes, i think, as a 15 year old girl myself, you are self too harsh.
if you ban her from everything she likes..especially cheer if it finances so much to her she's going to rebel BIG TIME! your daughter probably feels that if she doesn't go out drinking after her friends won't accept her...you said your daughter was an a/b student so obviously the girl have a lot of sense she will probably learn from her own mistakes,grounding never really works bcuz if my parents tryed to ground me i wuld have flipped and rebeled aswel!try giving her smaller quantity pocket money bcuz if she doesn't have the money to pay for the drink not many relatives are willing to share with her!
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